I have had the premise for this post bantering about in my head for weeks, months probably. Trying to find time to sit down uninterrupted and then gather my thoughts into coherent sentences is like trying to herd cats though. I have a serious appreciation for my fellow parent friends that are bloggers. I really don't know how they do it. That being said, I hope I am able to put my thoughts into words coherently here but if I fail, please don't hold it against me. Anyone who's ever had a teething infant living with them knows my current level of sanity.
Peruse any parenting forum and you will see mothers identifying themselves by a bunch of "stats". For example, I could say that I'm a babywearing, cloth diapering, formula feeding, pro-vaccination, non-circumcising mother. While this seems nice in theory, a good way to find like minded moms, in reality it drives me batty. It drives me batty because a good majority of these moms have an all or nothing attitude. You must follow their way or else be shunned. I see fellow babywearing moms scoff at people using a stroller. I hear cloth diapering moms shun people who use disposables because obviously those people hate the environment. By feeding my child formula instead of breastmilk AND vaccinating him on the AAP recommended schedule, I'm obviously trying to kill him. I won't even get started on the circumcision debate amongst parents.
As long as you are caring for your child to the best of your abilities and offering them a warm, safe bed at night and food in their bellies, I could care less where you stand on any of the above issues. I believe in baby wearing and cloth diapering but if you want to use a stroller and disposables, all the more power to you. I am 100% in support of breastfeeding but I couldn't myself so I had to formula feed. I think both are perfectly acceptable options and women should choose whatever works best for their family. I don't understand the people who refuse to vaccinate their children. I've read a lot of research and tried really hard to understand their stance but I just don't. However, if you don't want to vaccinate and you have a doctor willing to go along with you, so be it. I was completely on the fence about circumcision. I didn't really see a reason to have it done but I left the choice up to Brad. I figured he was more qualified to make a decision on our son's penis than I was. Brad decided to not have him circumcised and I supported that choice.
Any one of these issues can cause an all out war on many a forum though. I'm talking knock-down, drag-out, name calling, horribleness. I don't understand why parents are like this, usually mothers. Why they have to be so adamant that their way is the one and only way. The best way. Anything else is going to cause your child to have all sorts of issues. Why can't we all be a little more accepting? I watched the documentary "Babies" yesterday. To be more accurate, I watched it three times since it was keeping David happy and that made me happy. In that movie you see mothers from other countries doing things drastically differently than would ever be done here in the USA. In fact, some of the things the mothers did or allowed the babies to do would be considered illegal here in the USA. But, they just did what is normal for their culture. My point being that things are done differently all over the world so why can't things be done differently by women here? Why must everyone do things a certain way in order to be a "proper" parent?
I guess what it boils down to is how open minded you are. I have always considered myself rather accepting of others even if they are different from me in any way. I guess that translates to my parenting ideas too.
